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I n the disappointingly cool summer ofI bit the bullet and joined an online dating site.

Basic research blakc taught me there are two types of dating sites: Despite this, I decided to chance it on a free service, OkCupid. OkCupid is one of the most popular free dating sites on the web, with aboutmembers in the UK.

Here, the site has a reputation for cool, intelligent and politically liberal users, often with jobs in media, charity and technology. On the day I registered, before Discreet Horny Dating notice black females had even fully completed my blaci, I got into an instant-message conversation, initiated by a year-old graphic designer from south London. His profile picture showed brown hair, big brown eyes and a smiley face.

We chatted for about 20 minutes, discussing grammar, hay fever and egg sandwiches. It was easy, uncomplicated and fun.

Optimistic, I signed off. Then came the other IM conversations and emails.

Several have asked me: Not a single black male professional has ever contacted me. In one case, a guy in his first email asked me to do a threesome.

The men who approach you think you must be desperate and therefore a sure thing. Michelle runs and writes the Single Filezan anonymous dating blog, blaxk has managed to build up an impressive dossier of ignorance.

Alice had received an IM alert from a would-be suitor. His irresistible opening gambit? Perhaps, but offensive nonetheless.

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A femaled for OkCupid by OkTrends last October, found that black women members were more likely than any other ethnicity and gender group to reply to a first-contact message. In fact, their response rate was one and a half times the average.

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Inversely, they were the least likely group to get a response back — from any ethnicity. Louise Northwood runs a matchmaking service in north-east England. Amanda Christie, managing director of mysinglefriend.

I hate it when I see others do it and you never know who you might meet, so Frmales like to leave it open and see what happens. They consider it to be a legitimate preference, like having a penchant for blondes, or liking petite women.

She sees no problem with this. A choice that may seem accidental or innocuous in the real world becomes a deliberate exclusion online.

We are told there are plenty more fish in the sea. This article was amended on 4 April to remove some personal information.

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